Q1. Another example from this "orange" analogy might be selecting a cruise ship for a family vacation. The parents want a resort environment with several upscale restaurants. The kids want a pool with slides, rock climbing wall, and a buffet where they can get pizza or ice cream anytime. The parents want the entire family to enjoy dinner together in the dining room each night, but otherwise want the kids to be able to pursue their own interests on the ship with some adult supervision that doesn't always have to be the parents, who want some of their own down time and quiet time together. The kids don't want to be in a "kids club" all day with organized activities they might not like. The challenge here is for the family to find a ship that is their "orange"-everyone gets what they want from different parts of the same ship/cruise experience. Can you give an example of "trying to find the orange" from your own family vacation planning research & negotations?
Q2. You can usually identify one "top" item that's in both parties lists. If so, that may become their best alternative to reach an integrative negotiation.
There's a childhood game that this approach is based on. Does anyone remember it?