Assignment:
Instructions
• Complete the reading and writing.
• You may use your own paper for notes or planning. and you may use a dictionary, thesaurus: handbooks, and texts for reference. Write an organized and detailed essay. following these guidelines:
1. Summarize the essay.
2. Clearly state your position (thesis} in response to the author's argument.
3. Support your position with specific examples drawn from your own experience and observation as well as from examples in the reading or online.
4. Organize your ideas carefully.
5. Write clear sentences that use standard grammar: punctuation. and spelling.
6. Cite the assessment reading and any other sources you use at the end of your summary and response in either MLA or APA format.
Why You Should Learn to Say 'No' More Often By KRISTIN WONG
Humans are social animals who thrive or reciprocity. It's in our nature to be socially obliging, and the word no feels like a confrontation that threatens a potential bond. But when we dole out an easy yes instead of a difficult no we tend to overcommit our time, energy and finances. "The ability to communicate 'no' really reflects that you are in the driver's seat of your own life said Vanessa M. Patrick, an associate professor of marketing at the C. T. Bauer College of Business at the University of Houston. "It gives you a sense of empowerment." That's why learning to say no comes in handy.
One technique is the refusal strategy. A study in the Journal of Consumer Research by Professor Patrick and Henrik Hagtvedt found that saying "I don't" as opposed to "I can't" allowed participants to extract themselves from unwanted commitments. While "I can't" sounds like an excuse that's up for debate, "I don't" implies you've established certain rules for yourself, suggesting conviction and stability.
I remember how, as a recent college graduate, I was short on a student loan payment. I didn't say no to an overly friendly door-to-door magazine seller. I had a nice conversation with her but was out $30 and the magazines never came). 'We actually used the pushy salesperson scenario: selling magazine subscriptions," Professor Patrick said. She and her colleagues asked some subjects to sell magazines and others to say no. When subjects said "I don't" versus "I can't,' they were more effective in getting their point across, and the sellers were more willing to accept their refusal.
There are a few other ways you can get more comfortable with saying no. First, practice being more aggressive when the stakes are low. For example, when a cashier asks you to sign up for a store credit card you don't want, try saying "I don't use store credit cards" instead of a passive "Not today, but thank you,' which implies your decision is up for debate. It's a lot easier to be assertive with a stranger selling you something than it is when, say, your pleading co-worker asks for a ride to the airport. Get comfortable with your assertiveness when it's easy so you'll be prepared when there's more lot easier to be assertive with a stranger selling you something than it is when, say, your pleading co-worker asks for a ride to the airport. Get comfortable with your assertiveness when it's easy so you'll be prepared when there's more pressure.
Second, it's easier to say no when you know exactly how to say it so come up with a few anchor phrases for different situations. "No, I don't buy from solicitors" for door-to-door salespeople, for example. "No, I don't go out during the week" for co-workers who wart to go on a drinking binge on a Monday night. When you have these phrases ready, you don't have to waste time wavering over an excuse. And you start to develop a reflexive behavior of saying no.
Still, sometimes we're afraid to say no because we fear missing out. We want to take on new opportunities and adventures, so we say yes to everything instead. But all of those yeses can lead to burnout. "We live in a 'yes' culture, where it's expected that the person who is going to get ahead is the go-getter who says yes to everything that comes their way," said Dara Blaine, a career counselor and coach in Los Angeles. "It's when people learn to say no that I've really seen their careers take off," she said.
Still, some commitments and obligations are difficult to reject. You can't exactly tell your boss: Sorry, I don't work past 5 p.m., ever. But there are ways to ease into the refusal. If your boss wants to pile on extra work, for example, you might suggest you're not the best choice for that task because your plate is already full and you don't want to sacrifice quality. And if you're worried that your no might seem threatening, don't be. Research from Columbia University found that our perceptions of our own assertiveness are often unreliable. In mock negotiations, people who thought they were adequately assertive or even over-assertive were seen by others as under-assertive. So if you feel confrontational, there's a good chance the other party doesn't see you that way.
"You have obligations," Professor Patrick said. "But within the limits of your control, it's about operating at the most optimal level." For most of us, that means living a happier and less stressful life, which is easier to do from the driver's seat. Waiting for a nonexistent Vogue subscription while your student loan incurs interest? Not so much.