Assignment: The Negotiated World
In the following conflict, Brian explores a life-changing past experience and asks several "why" questions. Specifically, he is trying to determine why this conflict happened within a broader picture of his life events and life narrative. Recast- renegotiated-as a gainful turning point, the conflict can become a useful part of his full life story.
Exemplar Narrative: The Worst Job I Ever Learned From - BRIAN
I felt as if my whole life was being crushed in one of those machines the junkyards use to reshape a whole automobile into one of those nice, neat three-foot square cubes for shipment to whoever buys such scrap metal. Every nerve seemed to be tearing loose from its origin and insertion point, only to have that experience magnified with each new encounter with JB. I was losing it and I didn't know what to do to stop the cycle.
Four years earlier, I had successfully traversed the formidable five-step interview process with one of our major utility companies to secure a position in their advertising department. My duties included evaluating customer advertising needs; designing, proposing, and selling to these needs; and preparing copy for our printer. JB began training 12 of us new recruits. The eight weeks of eating, sleeping, and drinking ad design, UDAC (universal directory advertising codes), customer objection rebuttals, and closing techniques had reduced our class to five. The company grapevine had labeled JB "the hatchet man." He was also known as a very capable trainer, and I came to believe that about him during my eight weeks. He knew the business.
I had consistently been one of the top producers with two other sales organizations, and my intent was to follow that same path with this company. To do so, I needed to learn as much as possible from JB during training. I was sent directly from training to DJ, a field sales manager on the Raleigh campaign. JB told me that he and DJ felt I could fill the recent vacancy on DJ's sales team. I thought this was an honor as the other four in my training class were sent to a very small rural campaign to what was called a "training book." Even JB said I was fortunate.
DJ was a great encourager. He also allowed me the freedom to discipline myself as long as I produced the numbers for the team. For four years, we had a great working relationship as we moved from city to city. Statewide, there averaged around 60 reps with whom I shared the same job title. Each of us competed against one another. My years under DJ's supervision were very successful. That first campaign in Raleigh with him set the stage for me. I finished in the top five against some seasoned reps. For the next four years, I managed to consistently be a top producer. I came within "spare change" of being the year's top producer in the entire state.
The next year brought numerous changes in the company structure. The state was split into two territories with new local offices in Greensboro and Raleigh. I chose the Greensboro office because it allowed me to be at home nights during all but four months of the year. Previously, I had been home only on weekends, and in many cases, every other weekend. I was considering marriage and the Greensboro locations would give me more time for this relationship.
During a two-week vacation in December, I received notice that my request for an assignment to the Greensboro office had been granted. JB was called out of his trainer's position in Charlotte, and he would be my new manager. I enjoyed Christmas vacation with a number of pleasant thoughts. I had finished second in the state. I had made more money that year than ever before in my life. I was in love and scheduled to be married in August of the following year. My thoughts for the upcoming year were very positive. I could have more of a home life. I could begin to build on the ten acres I had bought that year. And I was comfortably familiar with my new sales manager, JB. Several of my coworkers had even commented on my good fortunes. What a success I thought I had become.
Two days after the new year began, I arrived in my new office in Greensboro. It was not hard to hold my head up among my new work crewmembers after the previous years. We spent the day organizing things so we could hit the streets the next day. JB arrived late in the afternoon and greeted us briefly, but he had his own things to organize. The next day, I felt as though he had knocked the breath out of me with one brief exchange. He came by my desk and remarked, "You did pretty well working for DJ." I said thanks. He continued, "Well, you're not working for him now. Let's see how well you perform doing things my way." Then he walked away.
Shock would scarcely describe my feelings. Surprise, amazement, discouragement, deflation, disappointment, maybe even insult were some of the feelings that raced through me. Why was I feeling such negative messages from JB? It got worse. No encouragement, no support, constant criticism, and growing resentments were my experiences. I no longer had the freedoms I had enjoyed with DJ. I felt like JB was constantly checking up on me for some unknown reason. I was required to give detailed activity plans that seemed unreasonable and unwarranted. The other duties of the job were stressful enough without all of this added pressure that I felt from JB. Attempts to address these issues with him failed miserably, and I got to the point where I didn't even try. I did try to avoid him.
At this point in the story I am back to where I began this narrative. The anxiety levels experienced in my relationship with JB were off the scale. Ulcers, panic attacks, and psychosomatic chest pains were the daily burdens. Months of this with no resolution or even understanding of the roots of this conflict led me to take a leave of absence from my work in September. The doctor's medications were not providing enough relief, so I began supplementing them with some of my own concoctions.
I never went back to work with this company, and the conflict continues as unresolved six years later.
Answer questions below in detail.
A. How did Brian's own expectations, character, and sense of self contribute to this chain of events?
B. How did the complexity of Brian's life figure in creating a climate that was primed for difficulty? (He married a woman with two children and was struggling to build relations with the children. He had new financial responsibilities. In the midst of this, his father died.)
C. How could Brian and JB communicate regularly about their work relationship?
D. How did Brian's avoidance and internalization of the conflict help form a downward spiral of communication?