Revise another email gone wrong.
Another angry writer sent the email below to employees of a news agency. (This is adapted from a real message-and the original was much longer.) Use the same process as above to revise this email.
First, discuss the issues in class. What went wrong? How would the audience likely have reacted to this message? What was the intended communication objective?
Did it likely achieve that objective? Next, revise the message. The purpose is legitimate: to improve how people fi le expense reports. But the approach and tone could be much improved.
Finally, compare your version with two others in class. How do they differ? What are the best parts of each version?
